This Is Just To Say
Posted by: LSM on: April 21, 2008
- In: Kids| Life in General
- Comment!
I established a love/hate relationship with the poems of William Carlos Williams–did his parents resent him at birth or something to give him that name–back in college when I had to explicate his The Red Wheelbarrow and then received an A for it. But tonight, my feelings shifted much more toward the “love” side of the spectrum as I listened to a hilarious segment about Williams’ poem This Is Just To Say on This American Life.
I have eaten the plums
that were in the icebox
and which
you were probably
saving
for breakfast
Forgive me
they were delicious
so sweet
and so cold
On the segment, frequent contributors to This American Life shared their spoofs on the above poem. Something is up (or actually, not up) with the speakers on my laptop, so I can’t relisten to the segment. Otherwise, I’d share some examples. I do highly recommend you take a listen though.
I think it would be fun to see how creative my bloggy friends are these days. Care to share your own spoof of This Is Just To Say? If so, either leave it in the comments or send me a link. I’ll update this post to send people your way.
And now I leave you with the “parenting a teenageer” version of This Is Just To Say.
I have dried
the shirt
made of 100% cotton
that was on your floor
and which
you were probably
planning
to air dry
Forgive me
if you had sorted
your own laundry
it would not be
so short
and so small
89 Responses to "This Is Just To Say"
April 22, 2008 at 12:06 pm
This is just to say
I have painted over
the flamingo and calamine lotion pink stripes
which you left
on the walls
of the kitchen
when you sold us your home.
You probably loved them.
So many hours of careful planning and measuring,
so many feet of masking tape,
so many perfect three inch stripes–all gone.
Forgive me
they were hideous.
April 22, 2008 at 2:17 pm
This is just to say
I have consumed
natures gifts
which you probably
saving
for your children
forgive me
oil s cheap
forests old
sky wide
just one butt
April 22, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Agreed – that was an awesome segment on This American Life. If only the whole thing could have been about William Carlos Williams…that cryonics story gave me the creeps. My favorite of the spoofs that were read was this one by Kenneth Koch:
Last evening
we went dancing
and I broke your leg
Forgive me
I was clumsy and
I wanted you here
in the wards
where I am the doctor
April 22, 2008 at 10:27 pm
Revised the first cause it had a couple errors (sorry, I tried to delete it but couldn’t. maybe you can) and I wrote two more at work today. It’s so neat to know that someone else heard “Mistakes Were Made” and felt as giddy as I did to write their own spoofs. Love This American Life!
—–
This is just to say
I have written the details
of our love affair in poems
which I have read in public
and am looking to publish
the details which
you were probably
saving
to take to your grave
for your pleas to St. Peter
to tell how someone good once love you
Forgive me
our love was beautiful and epic
so sweet
and so cold
This is just to say
I have wrecked the station wagon
which you so generously lent me
and which
you were probably
saving
to sell for cash
Forgive me
I am not much for being aware of things around me
and the car stopped
so suddenly
and I was on my cell
This is just to say
I have lost my virginity
which I was born of your womb
to cherish and preserve
and which
I probably should have been
saving
for a boy you approved of
or at least didn’t despise
Forgive me
it was AMAZING
so perfect
so there!
April 23, 2008 at 2:06 am
This is just to say…
When I ordered
the invasion
I knew you had no
weapons program
but we had
so many troops
and such sweet
expensive toys
Forgive me
I didn’t know another way
to seem like
a leader
April 23, 2008 at 10:34 am
This is just to say…
I never intend
To sleep
With you.
I know you
Expect it
To happen soon.
Forgive me,
Your bed
Is so convenient,
When I have
Had too much
To drink.
May 25, 2009 at 10:35 am
this is so funny i wounder if it happened to you i think that you did a great job you are so funny. here is mine..
this is just to say
i burned the house
which i think you may not like because it had value
i was bored and wanted to redecorate
forgive me but your house looked better with flames
it last a little bit of time but it was worth it
April 23, 2008 at 1:08 pm
After listening to this episode of This American Life as a podcast at work, and then cruising around the internet reading a variety of spoofs, this seemed a very natural and honest addition to this burgeoning genre.
This is just to say…
I have squandered
all of the
billable hours
budgeted for this project
and which
you were probably
hoping
to be paid for
Forgive me
the internet is fascinating
so extensive
and so much more interesting
April 24, 2008 at 11:21 am
This is Just to Say
I cleaned
the toilet
with your
toothbrush
which you probably
expected
to be sanitary
in the morning
Forgive me
it worked great
so pink
and so stiff
April 25, 2008 at 12:29 pm
Fabulous poem…
I have left
my mind
at the office
next to my computer
but you want me
to decide
what I will cook
for dinner
I have
three words for you
dial and dine
April 25, 2008 at 1:48 pm
this is just to say…
I have followed in your footprints for years
the ones you were probably
saving for your children
Forgive me
your steps were so sure
so strong
April 25, 2008 at 2:50 pm
This is hilarious. I have nothing to contribute, but I just wanedt to say …
[...] Published April 25, 2008 links Here’s a funny take on a familiar poem. Go look [...]
April 25, 2008 at 4:36 pm
Alas, this one is true and from the recent past:
This is just to say
I have run over your bicycle
that was in the garage
and which you were probably
planning
to ride with your friends
Forgive me
but if you had put it away
like I asked you to six times
it would not now be
so flat
and so broken
[...] at the circus Readersguide has just linked to a post over at somewhere in the suburbs about This American Life’s spoofs of William Carlos Willams’ “This is Just to [...]
[...] via this, found via somewhere in the suburbs [...]
April 25, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Now I’ve written one, too:
Here’s mine:
This is just to say
I have taken
the hats
that were on
the shelf
and which
you were probably saving
for the summer
Forgive me
they were lovely
so bright
and so voluminous
April 26, 2008 at 8:48 am
Great to see these collected! I wonder how many spoofs that episode of TAL ends up inspiring? Here’s mine:
I debunked
the fallacies
that you left in
my inbox
and which
you were probably
believing
as gospel
Forgive me
they were obnoxious
so ignorant
and so cold
April 22, 2009 at 11:11 am
I’m keeping this one to serve up as often as necessary! (Too often, no doubt).
April 29, 2008 at 3:40 pm
I have been trying to forget our entire history together.
From the time you burned your finger on the cigarette lighter in my Datsun to the point where we stood at the ferry waiting to say goodbye while we shared an instant hot chocolate.
Forgive me.
I know it was only a week, and I got mad at you for being vegan, but you looked way too thin, and my family fortune comes from sausages.
April 29, 2008 at 4:57 pm
I left the window open
last night
and let the cool air creep
into our cacoon
of hot breath and sweat
and yes, I saw
your sleeping hands search out
our faded white comforter,
but I couldn’t sleep
and had kicked the covers
onto the floor
to let the fresh breeze
tickle you awake.
Forgive me.
April 29, 2008 at 6:59 pm
This is just to say …
I’m sorry for the words
that made you
punch
the door
I did not
mean them
and you lost
your damage deposit
forgive me
but revenge is so sweet
so delicious
and best served cold
April 29, 2008 at 7:51 pm
This is Just to Say
I didn’t mean
to crash
your car
But it went
so fast
and I was racing
a truck
If only you’d switched to Geico
you could have
had your car fixed
April 30, 2008 at 8:10 am
oops…I sent before finishing
This is just to say
I may have just poured regular in your decaf cup
or maybe not
Think of me at two
a.m.
if only you weren’t so rude,
and ugly.
Forgive me
it was so tempting
and hot
and strong.
April 30, 2008 at 3:40 pm
This is just to say
I won’t be
home
for dinner
There was
a happy hour
and I drank
too much
Forgive me
I hate
my job and
your cooking
April 30, 2008 at 10:04 pm
Just listened to the TAL podcast today. Composed my own poem and then found your blog. Thought I’d add mine to the mix.
This is just to say
I have read all
the mail
that was in
your inbox
and which
you were probably
thinking
were private
Forgive me
they were so tempting
and your
password known
28 | This Is Just to Say | One Thing I Know
April 30, 2008 at 11:27 pm
[...] And here is a "parenting a teenager” version of the poem, I found here. [...]
May 1, 2008 at 7:31 am
Here’s my attempt:
I called
your new husband
by the name
of your old boyfriend.
The one
We thought
Would
Marry you.
Forgive me.
He was familiar
So jolly
And easy talk to.
April 14, 2009 at 6:09 pm
The best so far, so telling 
I have been the new boyfriend called by the name of the old boyfriend by the grandmother.
May 1, 2008 at 2:36 pm
This Is Just To Say
I am in love with Ed
He was once yours
and you probably
thought
he always
would be.
Forgive me
he is amazing
so sweet
and so good
(no, I didn’t go stealing him out from under her!)
May 1, 2008 at 9:53 pm
Here are the two I came up with, which I posted to my blog:
This is just to say
We made sweet love
Last night
After the meal
And the bar
Although
We agreed to not
Amuse
Our passions
Forgive me
It was amazing
So zealous
And carnal
——————-
This is just to say
I have flirted
With him –
Your husband,
And your love
And whom
You were probably
Waiting
For at home
Forgive me
He is handsome
And I
So youthful
[...] Those who I am asking for forgiveness include Exponential and the owner of this Blog. [...]
May 3, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Forgive me
for leaving the plums
from my science project
in the icebox.
You probably
thought that
I was saving them
for breakfast.
The trash can
was so far away
and I
was so tired.
May 6, 2008 at 10:58 pm
This is just to say, Mom…
I’ve told the story
More than once
To so many
You probably felt justified
In serving papers
By way of limo driver
To my father
At our wedding
Forgive me
But the joy felt
Through the terror seen
In the faces of those told
Is immeasurable
May 8, 2008 at 9:46 pm
I listened to the podcast of TAL’s show and I realized that this poem lends itself beautifully as a “Mad Lib.” Bear with me – I don’t have HTML skills.
This is just to say
I have [verb, past tense]
the [noun]
that were
[prepositional phrase]
and which
you were probably
[verb]
for [noun]
Forgive me
they were [adjective]
so [adjective]
and so [adjective]
May 14, 2008 at 7:41 pm
This is just to say
I have left
the greasy chicken pan
that was in the sink
which you were
probably saving for me
because you’re a vegetarian
Forgive me.
I was laughing
so careless
and cold.
May 15, 2008 at 7:45 pm
Here’s another attempt, for Dilbert and “The Fonz”
This is just to say…
I have smitten your computer with
my fist, smashing the circuitry,
crumpling the hard drive and
fracturing the pixelated splendor of your
nineteen inch monitor
I assume you were saving it
for grad school, or something literate, trendy and
genial…and here my hand so callously broken
forgive me
the laptop, like the piano is such
a delicate instrument
so black and
so white.
May 16, 2008 at 6:42 am
Carolyn,
I gave this to my kids as a Mad Lib and here they are:
This is just to say…
I have upchucked
the sheep
that were in
the jar
and which
you were stupidly
touching
for laundry
Roll me
they were scruffy
so dirty
and so yellow
———-
This is just to say…
I have blew up
the jellyfish
that were in
the couch
and which
you were impatiently
smelling
for school
Kick me
they were bumpy
so smooth
and so bright
May 26, 2008 at 10:52 pm
I have jammed on the brakes
which forced you to do the same
since you were driving
two feet
behind me
Forgive me
you probably thought
you could get there faster
than I am driving
May 26, 2008 at 11:13 pm
I have shredded the photos
that were in the back of your drawer
and which you were probably
saving
to remember your beautiful ex girlfriend
Forgive me
they were so flat
and old
[...] are some here and some here and some here and some here (in act [...]
February 25, 2009 at 7:48 pm
Here’s my version… sadly based in truth:
I kissed you
after the Cabaret
and allowed you to believe
that it meant something
Forgive me
the wine had made me heady
and the fresh sting from my
last relationship made me
foolish
and you were so comfortable
so willing
you were probably thinking
that this was your moment
and that I would fall in love
as you had
Please
understand why I don’t wish
to speak to you anymore
April 6, 2009 at 8:47 am
I realize now
that I shouldn’t have come to your home uninvited.
Forgive me.
you may not have known
how much I love you
but you know damn well
there is nowhere else
to hide the body
April 6, 2009 at 8:04 pm
This is just to say
I met some friends at Chili’s
And upon exiting my parking space
My parent’s Buick Electra Estate Wagon
(Deep sea metallic Blue with fake wood grain adhesive)
Left some Blue paint on your red pickup truck.
Forgive me.
You really shouldn’t have parked so close.
I was only 17, and not the best driver.
And your truck wasn’t that nice,
So you probably didn’t notice.
Even if you did, you probably dealt with it just fine.
April 12, 2009 at 4:20 pm
This is Just to Say
I burnt your wedding dress
that you wore
on the best day of your life
I wanted something to burn
For I am a pyro-maniac
and i got a new lighter
Forgive me it was
just so white
So flammable
April 12, 2009 at 11:35 pm
I was listening to everything you said,
although I have no idea.
It’s fair to say I got distracted
with it’s one simple button,
it’s everything I need.
I must admit,
I wrote this on my iPhone,
while you were talking.
April 13, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Gracie
I’m sorry I kicked you
in the face.
But there you were
on the floor
and I couldn’t get by easily.
You with your retriever hip
that expensive pills don’t quite cure.
But we adopted you old.
Out of pity.
AnyBean,
This is just to say
I finally read your post today.
Forgive me.
But to my dismay
Time just seemed to slip away.
It wouldn’t stop!
With the gods I hold no sway.
ur horrible to treat a creature that way
May 30, 2009 at 3:28 am
Good Grace
I tried to avoid kicking the dog in the head
but she loves me
so much
that she looks up
when I step across
because I give her food
and scratch her fur
and talk stupid
and took her home
before they
(you know)
because she is
so old.
April 13, 2009 at 5:07 pm
This is Just To Say
I did not warm the personal lubricant
Which was cold as an icebox
as you probably
noticed
Forgive me
You were delicious
I was so hot
And it, so cold
September 30, 2009 at 12:00 am
This is just to say
I was going to ignore
your declaration of love
when it leapt from your mouth
in the blue light of passion.
You must forgive
my impatience
with your explanation,
but your divorce is not cold,
And my heart is too hot
to be bothered
when I am only
using you for sex.
April 14, 2009 at 7:46 pm
This is just to say
I needed a way out of this place and time that feels so wrong
forgive me for being tired and hopeless
as I put the gun to my head and disappear
the peace that follows is so quiet,
so enveloping,
so cold
April 15, 2009 at 10:08 pm
I’ve checked to see if there was any way to reach this particular poster, but I can’t find a way to track him/her down. I’ll join the others in asking Anonymous to sign back on to let us know he/she is okay.
is u dead????!!!!! i was once suicidal, but it stopped, u have stuffs to live for, trust me!
what a second, u could be like, lets make lots of people worry, so i can laugh
sick joke, unless u really are dead???
April 15, 2009 at 7:55 am
Forgive me for finding us together
Your boyfriend and I
I was almost relieved when you burst in
I thought now she knows, for sure
She will know that he’s no good
for sleeping with me, her daughter
But you were so angry with me, instead
like it was my fault
like I seduced him
when I had no choice
but in a way it was like you were treating me like a big girl
like a grownup
like I had made the decision
for you to be cheated on
I felt so grown up
April 15, 2009 at 9:48 pm
I heard this segment today on this american life. Was this originally aired a year ago ?
Thanks
April 15, 2009 at 10:07 pm
I wrote the post the evening that I heard the segment, so it was around a year ago. I didn’t catch the rerun, but I’d guessed something was up from the increased traffic on this post. It’s still one of my favorites.
April 15, 2009 at 10:29 pm
Yes, around a year ago. The This American Life website can give you the exact date of the original airing, if you’re interested.
[...] out the need for sexual commentary. I don’t really know why, since it seemed to inspire thoughts about laundry for [...]
April 16, 2009 at 12:42 am
I have packed your body
that was entrusted to me
and which you probably wanted
unfrozen one day
into a cold metal can
smashed
against other bodies
in a grim dance
Forgive me
I had not room and
the metal can was so empty
and so cold
56 | Spoofing the poem ‘This Is Just To Say” « An exercise in frugality
April 17, 2009 at 1:09 am
[...] Spoofs on ‘Somewhere in the Suburbs’ blog [...]
April 18, 2009 at 10:48 am
This is Just To Say
I have murdered
Your mum
And placed her
In the icebox
By the sandwich
you were probably
serving
for breakfast
Forgive me
She was annoying
So bitter
And so cold
April 20, 2009 at 12:06 am
This is just to say
that I will always love you,
that I attribute who I have become because of you.
I am strong, brave, beautiful and quick.
I am eccentric, ambitious and good natured.
I am not you.
I have had lovers fall at my feet, proving their undying love.
Unlike you, they desired relationships and offered honest love.
Unlike you, they saw beauty in my character.
And you brought out the ugly for so long.
Life was beckoning though,
and in your reluctance and oppression I grew strong.
So forgive me, dad, for I am finally leaving.
A man is here to stand beside me.
You tried to make amends, and for that I am grateful
though they are
too little
too late
And he has deserved my trust.
April 20, 2009 at 5:40 pm
This is just to say
it was i
that made you feel
wounded
and alone for a minute today
something
you were probably
hoping to avoid
forever
forgive me
i was careless
because i love you
from deeper wounds
of my own
April 21, 2009 at 9:52 am
This Is Just to Say
I have chopped up the doll house
That your grandfather made for your mother
And your father repainted for you
I asked you to get it out of the garage
but you couldn’t be bothered.
It seemed right, because the garage was like
your heart
So dusty
And so cold
April 29, 2009 at 9:35 am
I have seen your husband
Dropping your children at daycare today
So tall and dark and handsome
I want him
I think he knows it
I think he would not mind
Forgive me,
He looks delicious
And I am so heartbroken
May 6, 2009 at 12:06 pm
Gracie Washed
I have taken you for another bath
It’s not your fault
Your fur, so thick, so white
Stained where you strain
To eliminate.
When you’re wet
Your skinny frame shows through
And people see
How fragile
How old.
Wrapped in a towel
You’re not
So cold.
May 17, 2009 at 7:22 pm
I’m sorry I didn’t call on mothers day. Though I doubt you expected to hear my voice. Its been 4 years already. Forgive me. Its the only way I can hurt you without you hurting me.
May 20, 2009 at 7:21 pm
This is my first one so its not good:
I’m sorry that you say it
The horror that was flashing through your mind
As I pulled it from the box
It’s body covered in warts
But limping like a noodle
No longer alive this ugly thing
You watched as I ripped it apart
Then I savored its juices
Just gushing down my face
I used your napkin then
The one with your initials
The one from your birthday
It is now drenched in those juices
The letters soggy and torn
You are probably angry
No longer can I stop myself
The taste of the flesh is great
I am a pickleholic
May 25, 2009 at 8:35 pm
this is just to say…
i have turned
completely from you
you probably
didn’t expect this
after all these years
forgive me
but your friend
was too much for me to take
as I hopped from
bed to bed to bed
June 10, 2009 at 5:04 pm
this is just to say
i actually
was never
into you
at all
although i
obviously
made you
think otherwise
forgive me
you looked great
and i was
so lonely
June 27, 2009 at 2:42 am
This is just to say
I have bought
the blue stacked-heel peep-toe pumps
that were in that cute boutique
and which
you were probably
planning to wear
for your party
Forgive me
they were irresistible
so pointy
and so promising
July 24, 2009 at 1:32 am
Mine:
This is just to say
I have laundered
your Ipod
that you left
in your skateboard shorts
Forgive me
I couldn’t tell it was there
the new board shorts are so big
and so heavy
August 20, 2009 at 1:43 am
This is just to say
I touched your boyfriend in that spot tonight
The one you have been telling me about
Forgive me
But you and I have never been especially close
And he has wanted me for so long
and. . .
This is just to say
I sold the house your parents left us
Forgive me
I suppose I should have told you I was planning to
But you’re so hard to talk to sometimes
And willing buyers are difficult to come by in this market
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Someone Said
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April 22, 2008 at 7:45 am
I love that poem – and I love your take on it. I’ll have to remember that next time I shrink my own clothes (I have no excuse, I’m just not that good at reading the labels).